Felix's Birth Story & Thoughts

On June 7, I had my normal OB appointment. Just like in the US, I was being seen weekly since 36 weeks. June 7 was my 39 week appointment, and I was 39 weeks and 4 days pregnant according to my LMP and the first ultrasound I had at 9ish weeks. Unfortunately, the OB I had been seeing the entire duration of my pregnancy took vacation the last two weeks of my pregnancy. I was kind of bummed that I would have to see another doctor, but I hadn't heard anything bad about any of them, and I was accustomed to seeing a million different doctors and midwives during pregnancy, so this wasn't a big deal. Besides, I knew I would be attended by midwives during my birth so I already would be possibly meeting someone new on Felix's birthday. The previous week, I had had an ultrasound too check fluid levels and the position of the baby and the quality of the placenta. Dr. Oender, my normal OB, measured the baby (who had been approximately 1-2 weeks ahead since 16 weeks). She estimated his weight at 6 1/2 lbs. So when this new OB measured him, I didn't expect her to say that he was 4kg (approx. 9 lbs). In fact, she didn't bring up his weight until I told her that I felt like I go into labor when my babies reach 7 1/4 lbs. She looked at me with wide eyes and said, "He's 4 kilos." But then she said, "I could be wrong." I was comforted by that until she followed that up with, "but you're very big. Do you always get so big?" Anyway,  I asked her to check my cervix to see if any changes had occurred since I was last checked, and she did and we found that not much had happened. I left the doctor feeling pretty depressed. I was in an incredible amount of pain (aches and pregnancy discomforts), I was still dealing with all-over-body itching, and I couldn't get a good night's rest due to heartburn, having to pee, and all those discomforts I mentioned. So, I went to the BX for a little retail therapy. I even posted on Facebook that my due date had changed to June 17 because I didn't want to deal with people asking me if he'd arrived yet.

me at 37 weeks, looking fancy

In the late afternoon of that day I began having totally random painful contractions. But I didn't suspect anything, honestly. I just thought, "great, now I am having random pains. Awesome." So I watched some TV with my mom and Montanna, and went to bed around 10:30. Then I felt like I was having contractions. I was excited but a little mad that they were already so painful. Usually contractions start off feeling like an ache that is not very painful at all, but these were already very painful. So after 10-15 minutes of trying to fall asleep, I gave up and got out of bed. I didn't tell Montanna what was up, but I texted my mom and asked her to stay up with me to see if it was the real deal. So, she showered and timed them. Unfortunately my decision to eat taquitos for lunch that day (the crappy ones in the freezer aisle...ewww) had come back to haunt me (or that was another sign of labor), and I was visiting the bathroom over and over and over again. In fact, that began to bother me more than the contractions, which were about 2-4 minutes apart. I decided to take a bath to see if that would help and my mom joined me (in the room, not the bath, haha!). The bath was great, but I kept having to get out to use the bathroom. Soon I decided to break out the Tucks pads that I had purchased for after birth.

Around 1 or 2 am, we woke Montanna, because I didn't feel like it was going to be long before I wanted to go to the hospital and get checked. I probably should have waited, but I knew that if I hadn't made much progress I could come back home since the hospital was only a few minutes away. So, after we woke up my friend and picked her and her daughter up and got everyone situated, and we left for the hospital. It was raining. Nevertheless, we decided to take our usual "outside the hospital picture."

Birth day! 3:30am June 8

my view from the birth ball, next to the bed, in delivery room

View of birthing bed, my mom, window in delivery room

View of squatting bars, Matisse, and tray of stuff in delivery room

We arrived around 3:30 am. I was hooked up to the monitor, given something for heartburn, had my cervix checked (3cm and partially effaced). I sat on the ball for my 30 minutes of monitoring and decided I would then hop in the tub. The midwife on staff at the time was very nice, though I do not remember her name. She was only with us for a few hours, most of which I spent in the tub. St. Johannis requires only 30 minutes of monitoring every three hours if things are going well.

Here are a few pictures of our room. I love all of the stuff that they have available for you. There are birthing balls, this awesome adjustable bed, squatting bars (attached to the wall), cool décor (Matisse and a birth picture), and even hooks to string up a wrap or a rope to pull on while laboring/pushing. The birth tub was amazing and very calming. They had fake candles and pretty glowing lights that twinkled blue and white. There was also a bathroom in the room so that you didn't have to drip all the way down the hall to use it.

Me lounging in the tub with sweet inflatable pillows

 The tub was awesome. Unfortunately, I asked for the water to be too hot. The temperature was great for my back and the contractions, but it made me feel warm overall. Plus, they made me drink a bunch of water so that I wouldn't get dehydrated (notice I am not hooked up to an IV?). I kept having to get in and out to pee, and oh yeah, remember those taquitos? haha. So, after a while, I decided I was too hot and I wanted to get out. So, we moved back to the delivery room. Besides, there was a shift change and then I was going to be due for my monitoring. The next time I was checked, I was 6cm, and thinning out, which was great. I decided to get an epidural around 8 or 9 am. I was having back labor, hadn't had any sleep, my butt hurt a ton from pooping way more than anyone ever should, so I guess my heart wasn't in it to deal with the pain. More on that later. Anja, the new midwife, felt that once I got the epidural, had my water broken, the baby would come down more in my pelvis and my cervix would open the rest of the way and I would be pushing in a few hours. I mean, we all really felt like I would have Felix before noon.

Well, Felix had other ideas. Instead of getting a pump which would deliver a continuous dosage of epidural meds, I ended up getting one shot worth of medicine (which lasts 2 1/2 hours). So, around 11, I started feeling contractions again. Luckily my doula had arrived, and she helped me through the contractions until about 2pm when I got another dose. I was checked around 11:30-12, and I was at 9cm. So we all thought the end was near! It certainly wasn't. Unfortunately Felix was malpositioned, facing my belly button instead of my spine. What's funny is that my whole pregnancy he was facing my spine, so that we never got a good profile picture of him, even though I had an ultrasound at EVERY appointment! My OB would say, "your baby makes it interesting!" The problem with being posterior is that the baby often won't fit through the birth canal unless he turns. This was the case with Felix. He had trouble even fully engaging in my pelvis. To make matters worse, whenever I would get in a good position to facilitate him turning, his heart rate would drop. For instance, they wanted me to lean over a birth ball, but his heart rate kept dipping. Also, this position is notorious for causing severe back pain in addition to contractions, so yay me.

At this point we got a new doctor who didn't speak English. Like, she spoke as much English as I spoke German. We also got a new midwife, Christina. The doctor explained with a variety of charades and German words that part of my cervix (mutter mouth!) was caught and swelling, which prevented it from dilating the full 10 that I needed to begin pushing. Unfortunately no one knew the word for swelling in German, so she just kept saying the German word for thick, which is (unfortunately) 'dick.' So, she would puff up her cheeks and make like a makeshift cervix with her hands to illustrate what she meant and then say, "dick! dick!" That gave us a laugh or two. In a bit after that, she asked me to push while she held part of my cervix out of the way. After this doctor, we met another doctor, the one who would eventually deliver Felix. Her name was Dr. Mariana.

Now that my cervix was out of the way and fully dilated, our issue was that Felix was so high up in my pelvis. I'm not sure at this point if he was still facing posteriorly or what. But in any case I was feeling my contractions full force again, and I refused to push. Seriously, they tried to make me, but I couldn't forcefully push. It was the kind of pain that made me unable to do anything but just writhe there in pain. The midwife and doctor kept saying, no, no, I needed to feel the pain or whatever. But I told them, no. I would not push without it. Finally, they relented. My wonderful doula, Angela, told me at one point that I would have to be more forceful if I really wanted to receive a dose of medication, so I doubled down. And that's the great thing about doulas. I hired Angela to help me cope for a natural birth, but the moment I decided I needed pain relief, she made no bones about it and continued to support me in getting what I needed. I promised everyone that I would push with the greatest force known to man if I could just get some help with the pain from contractions.

Well, this was all the start of a very exciting 2-3 hours. I got my dose of pain medication. (Montanna's favorite moment around this time was when the anesthesiologist, a woman, was checking my pulse while "Across the Universe" was playing, and she said, "The Beatles?" And he said, "yes." and she replied, "hmph." Like, a disapproving Hmph.) I also got some Pitocin to make my contractions stronger. Then Felix's heart rate dropped and I was given what we believe was epinephrine because as they were injecting it into my heplock my heart started beating  in a fashion that can only be expressed by cartoons... you know the cartoon where the character's heart beats in a heart shape out of its chest? Yes, like that. It was insane. I guess this worked because I wasn't knocked out for an emergency C-section, and soon I was being positioned for some epic pushing.

The bed was moved in a position so that I could be monitored and in the squatting position at the same time. Then I was asked to push for quite a long time while squatting. I pushed with approximately 4 people telling me "harder! longer! push!" They kept telling me to curl up while I did it, even though I felt that was impossible with the GIANT baby I had in my abdomen. But I kept trying. They wanted me to take one huge deep breath (impossible) and push with that for the duration of my contraction (impossible). But I had to breathe deeply, push, exhale, breathe deeply, push, and exhale. Somehow this managed to move him deeper into my pelvis. I was told to feel his head. I didn't want to. Then I kept being told I was doing a great job, and I kept thinking (and I think I even said at some point, "No, I'm not!"). I also remember saying, "No. Nope. I'm done," which in retrospect I think was cute. At some point I was told to push while lying on my side, pulling up one leg while leaving the other straight and curling myself into a ball again. I guess that helps? Anyway, I pushed like this FOREVER. They pushed on Felix's bottom (my abdomen) while I pushed. I remember at some point my doula asked the doctor about using the vacuum (just an interested question... like "do you think we'll be using the vacuum?") and I remember thinking, "YES, that would be great! I wouldn't have to do all this work that is apparently doing nothing." But then I did manage to consider the fact that his head may sustain injury and I might have to have an episiotomy so I did resolve to do it myself, begrudgingly.  Before I started pushing, the doctor did say that the baby wouldn't be able to handle hours of pushing (even though he did...sort of). Then I started crowning and it was terrible.

I remember crowning with Vivi and Phoebe. I do, and it was one of those surreal moments in life, but then it seemed like it was over in a matter of minutes. With Felix, that pain lasted a good 30 minutes. I would push and then my midwife would say, "STOP, MRS EVERS." And I would secretly hate her. And I would try to push when I wasn't having a contraction. And I would think, " Can I be alive right now? Can I continue to exist in this pain?" It was all very surreal. I'm sorry, surreal is the only word I can think to describe this. I guess because for me it was so painful that it seems like it is incompatible with life... or consciousness. I'd be instructed, "Push his eyebrow out... push out his nose" etc. It took a very, very long time to push out his ginormous head. And when his head was out, I was asked to relax my legs, and the midwife grabbed one and the doctor grabbed another and they pumped my legs a few times. Later I found out that this helped turn his shoulders in a more favorable position. Then I pushed again and I don't remember if there was any help used (on my abdomen) but it felt like he flew out and I yelled, "FINALLY!"

And he was so beautiful, but blue. He was quite blue. His eyes were closed and he was so beautiful. He was breathing, so they let Montanna quickly cut the cord, and he was taken to a small room right off of our room to be given air (not oxygen) and stimulated. They kept him for about 30 minutes. Luckily we heard him cry a few minutes after he was moved so we knew that he was doing at least marginally well. He passed his first bowel movement while I was pushing him out (but after his head entered the canal so he couldn't aspirate it, luckily) so they needed to check his cord blood oxygen level to make sure that he went into distress later rather than earlier. If he had been in distress earlier he would most likely have to be moved to a different hospital because ours didn't have a NICU. Anyway, after about 30 minutes they brought me our beautiful boy.

And told us he was 9 lbs 3.5oz and 21.5". Well, now it all made sense why I had such difficulty getting him out. He was by far my biggest baby. Sophie was 7lbs 4 oz, 21"; Phoebe was 7 lbs 7 oz and 20.25"; and Vivi was 7 lbs 4.5oz and 18".

Thoughts

So having a baby in a German hospital was amazing. The language barrier wasn't a problem because there was always someone around who spoke excellent English. I really felt that the staff of nurses and doctors worked hard to figure out what would best help bring about a natural birth. They definitely tried everything they could before giving me medicine of any sort. Yet again, I wanted to forego the epidural but I found myself unable to do so.

My husband has a few thoughts on this. He has said that I always say something to the effect of, "I won't get pain medication unless..." and then I always find I need it, whereas when it comes to something like breastfeeding I am unyielding, so I always make it through whatever obstacle that might have lead me to use formula. I'm not sure that his point is exactly it, but I'm sure that has something to do with it. I guess, deep down I don't feel like accepting pain medication is so bad. I mean, it wasn't exactly "pain" that I wanted to experience, but I wanted to feel like I was really experiencing birth in an extremely intense way. When I had Sophie, my epidural was so strong that I was unable to push her out and I needed a forceps delivery, and the complete and total lack of pain coupled with a lack of agency made the whole moment of her birth less emotional. With Felix, I definitely didn't have that... the epidural was perhaps the best one I have had because it did, for the most part, numb my contractions but still let me experience the intensity of birthing my baby. I just wish they had used the pump instead of individual doses of medication.

After having given birth at an excellent hospital in Philadelphia (Hahnemann University Hospital), I was a little bit weary of going to a small hospital in Germany. In Philly, I felt that they were very focused on helping women maintain an intact perineum (no tearing, no episiotomy) and I wasn't sure that when it came down to it, this staff would focus on that very much. However, they did an amazing job making sure that I delivered without injuring myself. That is amazing and has made my recovery so much better.

I feel like when I describe this birth to others that I focus on the pain. I don't mean to suggest that it was bad, just that it was so intense. The act of getting him out of my body required so much work and effort on my part and so much help from others cheering me on and focusing my energy. After having three babies, I thought that the fourth would be out in a matter of a few pushes, and I was so wrong! I guess birth is the great unknown that is so difficult to plan for. I guess that's why when people tell me that they're not preparing for birth because they're getting an epidural, I try to tell them that often an epidural doesn't mean "pain free" birth. My doula was so helpful in helping me cope with the contractions, rubbing my feet, asking me to take deep breaths during the contractions, and helping me advocate for myself.

Congratulations if you made it to the end of this long, long posts. :)

Why I am not a good blogger...

And I knew this would happen once I had been "off Facebook" for long enough. I would get frustrated with the blog. No real comments. No better connection with people. Not worth it? I mean, I suppose I don't have to see many people's Donald Trump support posts or "why Hillary Clinton in the anti-Christ" posts. I suppose that is helping me out in the long run. But, I realized the reason why my blog is not "popular" even among my friends. I'm not posting controversial things. None of the "Why Europe is SO much Better than the US" posts. or "Why the Republican Party is Certifiably Crazy."  Or what if I wrote about my experience as a Mom... "I Let my Kids Watch A Lot of TV and I Don't Care What You Say" or "Your Kids Should Already Recognize Letters" and "Why My Kids Don't Speak German." I'm sure that'd generate a lot of traffic or comments. It's funny, but you'd think after 36 years I would have learned to be at peace with not getting what I want from people. :) And really, I'm mostly just journaling our time here, so I really shouldn't expect to get anything out of it other than a record...

And with that... here's what we did this weekend. We've had a fairly regular tradition of going out to eat with Montanna's coworkers a few Fridays a month. Usually we go to the same place (good food, good place, if it ain't broken, don't fix it, am I right?) but this time we decided to try something different. Because we always bring along our young kiddos, we were looking for a family friendly place, and we found a great Ethiopian restaurant called Safari. Not having much experience with the food, we opted for a platter that had several different dishes on it, and we asked for it to be spicy. It was soooooooooooooooooooooooooo good. On the way home, Montanna and I were trying to pinpoint exactly what was so good about it, and I think we narrowed it down to being hearty (like a stick-to-your-ribs meal) and how satisfying it is to eat with your hands. I'm not sure it's the best place to eat during very warm weather (although each dish came with a tiny salad garnish that was AMAZING, so if I could get that on a hot day, I'd be happy).

Our platter for 3. The rolled up things were the bread we used in place of silverware.

 On the platter were stewed lamb, beef, and some chicken legs. Also a variety of what appeared to be lentils (kind of a mushy lentil?) which were very well flavored especially when mixed with meat, and some stewed potatoes, cabbage, and carrots. Also, eggs.

Flames below the Gored Gored.

I also took a picture of our friend's dinner because it was presented in such a cool fashion. We had dessert; mango topped with yogurt and cinnamon. We had coffee as well. The coffee had a distinct flavor (lemongrass?) and it was served with popcorn, which the kids adored. As is the case with most restaurants in Europe, there was no kid menu (though kid menus are fairly standard in tourist areas), and I anticipated that Phoebe wouldn't be interested or able to eat there, so we brought her food. It's a good thing, because they seemed to prepare most everything with ghee (which is dairy). So, they munched on "jam sandwiches" (sunbutter & jelly), apples, chicken, and marshmallows. Yum.

On Saturday we decided to check out Olsbrücken's Torch Hike. So the story is that every year, the villagers light torches and hike up to the Schutzhenhaus and burn away winter with a big bonfire. There are brats and drinks for sale. We thought that sounded like fun.

Obligatory "before" picture

Eerie procession

Umm, how handsome is my husband in this pic??

Lesson learned: when torches are involved, someone's face is going to be obscured.

I really enjoyed it. Apparently there was an Eisbar set up, which sounded pretty cool, but being pregnant, I didn't enjoy anything stronger than a coke. I also didn't bring my camera because I figured the pictures wouldn't be good. Well, lesson learned there too. Next year we're definitely bringing the "good" camera. The hike, although it was super short, really wore me out. This pregnancy is kicking my butt, but I'm savoring every minute of it.

Here's a video of the timber going up in flames. Sorry about my silly laughing.

The allergy clinic...

As most of you know, our Phoebe has food allergies (milk, eggs, peanuts, tree nuts, sesame). She also has had issues with asthma, eczema, and seasonal allergies. Every year, we have her blood tested to check the level of antibodies (IgE) to a particular set of allergens. This year, I was hoping that she would demonstrate lower levels and perhaps be cleared to eat more foods. I totally neglected to have them test for common pollens and other environmental allergens, but as it turns out, the clinic did it anyway. Super awesome!

Unfortunately, her blood tests didn't seem to yield much hope. Nothing seemed to have dropped to a low enough level to warrant trying to incorporate them into her diet. And the environmental allergies were pretty bad too, but we knew that about our Sneezy Phoebs. In any case, the pediatrician suggested that we go to the allergy clinic anyway, and I'm so happy that we did!

Phoebe's blood test results

So, today was our appointment at the allergy clinic. Aside from having to park in BFE, and having Phoebe drag me along which seemed to really irritate my stretched round ligaments, we finally found the clinic, which is hidden deep in the halls of the "most state of the art [American] military hospitals in the world" according to an Al Jazeera reporter.  One of the cool things about going to this clinic is that I had a friend there! We met almost a year ago while taking prerequisite science courses at the local community college here. She and I both share a passion for hard work and good grades. So, since our last class together ended in December, I have missed chatting with her and hanging out. Somehow she managed to be able to help us out.

I spoke with the doctor at length about Phoebe's allergy history. Starting with her eczema (5 weeks) and her first allergic reaction (~8 months) to outgrowing soy and wheat (~3 years) and sneezing all the time. He had a glimmer of hope to offer us with regard to eggs, so that was cool. Apparently, Phoebe may be one of the many kids who can tolerate small amounts of cooked eggs. So, we signed up for a "muffin test," and we will be doing that in a few short weeks. We also talked at length about allergy shots. I think those are definitely in our future, but there are several factors to consider when undertaking such a long and involved process. We haven't talked as a family very much about it, but it seems that it's best to put off shots at least until we PCS to our next duty station. I'm cool with that. Phoebe is allergic to many grasses and the FDA has just approved a sublingual tablet for grass allergies that works much in the way an allergy shot does. (There are no allergy shots for foods.) We may begin that tablet before we move and using it will not interfere with our plan to begin shots in the next few years.

Then, we did some skin tests for environmental allergens (this is what made our shot conversation relevant). Phoebe was so terribly brave. There were tears, but no fighting or screaming, which is always appreciated by staff, other patients, and of course parents alike. We then passed the time playing games and eating candy (Thanks, MB!).

Moments after application.

a few minutes after application

Ready to read the results

My good sport, playing a matching game while we wait.

 I'm so happy that after what seemed like totally disappointing news from her 5 year well-check that we're now looking at finding some relief from the environmental allergies and restrictions in her diet. Wish us luck on our blueberry muffin challenge!

Have you, dear reader, had any experience with allergy shots? The world of treatment for environmental allergies is all new to me (aside from Claritin, etc.).

Happy Valentine's Day!

We were definitely looking forward to a 3 day weekend. We'd had a super busy week the week of Phoebe's birthday, and I think we were all looking for a little rest. We even managed to sleep in. On Saturday, we'd planned on taking an awesome torch (like fiery torch) hike in the woods and light a bonfire of Christmas trees, but the mayor decided to reschedule the hike in the hopes of better weather. Look forward to a post on that, weather permitting.  Montanna and I had been super impressed with our initiative in getting out and "doing something" cultural. Oh, well.

So we decided that the next day we'd do something with the kiddos. We considered seeing Kung Fu Panda 3, mostly because it's the only kids movie out right now. Then, we decided that it wasn't worth the money, and instead we went bowling. And it was a blissfully slow day at the alley! And they had a special. Here are some pictures...

Vivi liked crouching and watching people bowl.

Umm, the food here is actually good.

This picture happened because I forgot to disable the self-timer.

Phoebe and I had some fun with the self-timer when Vivi and Daddy were in the restroom.

She was just generally unable to remain in the designated non-bowler area.

Trying to open some Valentine's chocolate.

Phoebe at work.

Vivi's turn.

Tickle monster.

Phoebe pouting after she pushed Vivi down for not backing away during her turn. Also, congratulated the dude in the background on getting Kirby Smart as a head coach for his football team. We both agreed Kirby was awesome.

Daddy helped Vivi bowl because she was kind of pouting after falling on the hard bowling floor.

Look at that pose.

Counting the holes in the balls.

Serious goofball.

So, over all we had a fantastic Valentine's day. We wrapped up our day by eating leftovers, skyping with Sophie, and talking with Grandpa E on his birthday. Hope you guys had a spectacular evening too!

Happy birthday, Phoebe!

This Saturday, February 6th, our little girl Phoebe turned 5. She is 9 1/2 years younger than Sophie, so having her was a lot like having a baby for the first time. I hadn't been married when I had Sophie, so that was different. I had long forgotten the baby/toddler years now that Sophie was self-sufficient (for the most part) in terms of bathing, dressing, sleeping, and eating. I hadn't saved a lot from Sophie's babyhood, aside from a few toys and books, so the process of acquiring all of the baby things was again new and exciting. Anyway, though she was due on my birthday, she ended up being born 8 days late on Super Bowl Sunday. I think the Packers won. I put the game on in my room, but I was a bit tired, and just enjoying snuggling my delicious little newborn.

Birthday

She had her umbilical cord wrapped three times around her neck and wrapped around her arm and legs, so that lovely scratch on her forehead is from the catheter used to supplement the amniotic fluid to relieve pressure on the umbilical cord during contractions. Her heart rate would slow during my contractions, so they were somewhat worried. Luckily, we chose one of the best hospitals in the area for the births of our girls, and they managed everything really well. She was the most calm, sweet little baby. She didn't cry during any of her exams or injections in the hospital, and they kept telling me how awesome that was, considering some of them were considered painful. She was a perfect baby, and we all left the hospital after the standard 48 hours.

One year.

Two years.

Three years, first year in Germany.

Four years old.

5 years old with her 70 year old fossil dust. Chair picture coming soon.

For the third birthday in a row, we have visited a local dinosaur museum. It has a lot of information, but the coolest part of the whole experience is the habitats that they have recreated with animatronics. You feel like you've stepped into a dinosaur's territory. There are a ton of cool things to see, especially if you are young, love dinosaurs, and have a bit of imagination. They also have an indoor park, which is great for a February birthday. So, we toured the museum again. Phoebe worked on a fossil and was gifted some 70 million year old fossil dust (see above picture). And we played. Then, we came home, had friends over for beer brats and cupcakes and presents. It was a great night. A wonderful day and evening to commemorate the birth of our Phoebe.

Phoebe's fossil gift

One of the more intense scenes from medieval England

Nothing like some cotton candy after playing for a few hours.

Way too happy about medieval torture.

Vivi wanted to do it too.

Vivi is drilling away at the fossil.

Phoebe taking her turn with the fossil drill.

Vivi, Phoebe, and her friend who joined us at the museum that day, in one of the habitats.

Altogether it was a wonderful birthday. We're so happy to have such an incredible child in our family. Just for posterity's sake, let me talk about Phoebe as a five year old. She's still allergic to milk, eggs, peanuts, tree nuts, and sesame, and it doesn't look like she will outgrow any of those allergies any time soon. She's pretty good at counting, and we're working on learning how to read. She knows a lot about dinosaurs and planets. She also has a healthy appreciation for princesses. Her favorite holiday is Halloween. Her favorite structured activity is gymnastics. She's also in a combination tap and ballet class that she enjoys. When school starts, we may not be able to continue with both, but we shall see what we can handle. She's still sucking her thumb. She and her younger sister alternate playing well together and fighting with another. She adores her older sister. She's looking forward to having a baby around and says that she can sleep in her room, under her bed. That's our Phoebe! 

A baby overseas

Well,  you probably know that I am eating for two these days. Since I am having a baby in Germany, I really wanted to use my personal blog to chronicle my personal experience receiving German maternity care. I have had three babies in the United States, so when I had the opportunity to receive care at the American hospital on base or the German hospital, I opted to go to the German hospital. I had heard really good things about delivering at the local hospital, and with Germany having a better record of maternity care than the United States, I didn't think it was that big of a gamble.

In July of 2014, when I was 4 months pregnant, we learned that I had lost the baby. We had been seen at the American hospital (I was less adventurous at this point in our stay here), and I have to say that I was treated well for the duration of my pregnancy. They were particularly accommodating in dealing with my loss. We decided to wait for quite a while before trying again, mostly because Vivi was still in the pre-terrible twos, and we wanted to figure out living here a bit before we added another baby to the mix. Not to mention, I felt we needed to heal from the loss first. I certainly don't judge those who decide to try and get pregnant right away after a loss--we just chose to wait because it was right for our family.

Anyway, we had initially planned to wait until 2016 to conceive, but I felt that I wasn't getting any younger. Montanna and I have always been incredibly lucky to conceive quickly, and this time was no exception. So, with great fear & anxiety, we discovered the news in October. I didn't want to tell anyone until I made it for a while and saw a healthy baby on the ultrasound. I knew that seeing a healthy baby at one point didn't mean that everything would be ok, but For some reason, I felt like I had to see it this time.

In November, I was able to get an appointment with my German doctor. She and the staff were so incredibly nice and kind. My first appointment consisted of the normal weight, blood pressure, and urine check. Because I was American, I was told that I would have to fill out "a lot" of paperwork, which only ended up being two short sheets of paper. Nothing like the books I am used to filling out. Then, the doctor interviewed me on my pregnancy history. This was pretty uneventful. Then, I told her I was very nervous because of what had happened, and she said, "Well, let's go look!" So, we went in, and she allowed me to take a video for my family. It was wonderful.

So, after that I appointment, I felt confident enough to share. With my previous pregnancy, I had only told a few people that I was expecting, so when I experienced the loss, it wasn't very public. I decided to go back to our old method of letting everyone know pretty early. It just felt right.

So, I shared this picture of the girls on Facebook. It was pretty exciting. From that point on we have had a fairly uneventful pregnancy, which is what you'd like! Each appointment with my doctor, every four weeks until 8 months, consists of blood pressure, weight, urine check, and ultrasound. After 16 weeks, I received what's called a "Mutterpass." It's a small book that contains all of my test results and pertinent pregnancy information. If I need to go to the emergency room anywhere in Europe, I can hand over this information to the physician and not have to rattle off all of my information while I'm in a state of distress. It's pretty cool, I think. I hope I get to keep it after I deliver.

It's no secret that we've been wanting a boy. I feel like I was a bit to preoccupied with gender in my last pregnancy. Not that my preoccupation was "why" I lost the baby, but I do think losing that baby made me especially focused on having a healthy baby and pregnancy and seeing the gender as an afterthought. Really, I was just convinced that we were having a girl. But, I thought, on the off chance that we happen to be having a boy, I wanted to find out by myself so that I could do something special to surprise Montanna. So, I went to my 16 week appointment by myself, but our silly baby was in a crazy position. Its hands were above its head, and its legs were crossed and feet up by its face. Legs were completely closed! Bummer. So, we scheduled for the next appointment (January 26th) and hoped we'd be able to see then. Well, I thought that I would make an appointment for the week prior to this appointment, but when I called the elective ultrasound place, they had an opening that day (January 8th). So, I quickly got ready and took the kids to a friend's house. Well, after waiting thirty minutes, they called me back into the room, and the doctor told us...

It's a boy! Holy cow! I couldn't believe it. In fact, I kept telling the doctor this, and he'd say to me, "Well, I don't know what this little dangling thing is, I only deal with women." He was really funny. So, I took this photographic evidence, picked up the kids, and we went to buy a little boy present and go surprise Daddy. I bought this little set that said, "Future #1 Draft Pick" (we're pretty big football fans). I put that outfit and the ultrasound pictures in a gift bag with pink tissue paper in it. When he pulled out the shirt he said something like, "A girl draft pick?" I know he was thinking that I would come up with some feminist thing about girls of the future being able to play football/be drafted, haha. So, it was pretty awesome to see him realize that I was being typical. :)

And that's about where we are now. I am just over half way done, and our little boy so far has been checking out to be super healthy and doing great, for which we are thankful every day. Being pregnant with a boy has definitely been a little different than when I was pregnant with the girls. I am definitely less emotional (lack of extra extra estrogen?). I have had a few more tummy troubles than usual. And I seem to be carrying a lot higher than I usually do. I do think being pregnant several times lends you an interesting familiarity that you generally don't get when you're pregnant once or twice. I definitely feel like I know what to expect, and I suppose I have an easier time planning around it.

I'm definitely excited to welcome a baby boy to our household in June!

Approximately 21 weeks.

A year in review...

I am looking forward to keeping this blog so that it may be an instant "year in review" for next year. Plus, perhaps it will inspire us to get out and do more stuff. I assumed that getting out and traveling in Europe would be totally easy, but it hasn't come easy to us. The normal day-to-day activities have really slowed us down in terms of checking off countries we've visited. In some ways, I am fine with that. There's no need, in my mind, to have said that I have visited every country or city in Europe. I want to go to places and really get a feel for them. I guess that's why we have visited some of the same areas several times. We also like staying local and getting to know our community. In any case, even though I posted about all of this stuff on Facebook, here's what we did last year...

January -

We rang in the New Year at home. Just like Americans, Germans adore fireworks for their New Year's celebrations. Fireworks do go off all day sporadically, but when the clock strikes midnight, you'll hear a constant popping of fireworks for at least an hour. It's a pretty spectacular thing to see. Unfortunately, both the kids had fallen asleep by this point.

February -

Phoebe turned four, and we visited Das Praehistorium again. In fact, we are going there for her 5th birthday as well. It's a wonderful animatronic dinosaur "museum" type place with a playground. There are several rooms and a "time travel" area that are decorated in unimaginable detail and feature really clever animatronic dinos. We enjoy going once or twice a year.

March -

I began taking prerequisite courses for a degree in Nutrition with the goal of becoming a registered dietitian in the (distant) future. My first course (after not having had biology since 2004) was Microbiology. It was incredibly difficult, and I had to study several hours per day, but I ended up with an A. An A+. Montanna and I also traveled to Strasbourg for a weekend alone, which was great!

April -

School continued for me, and we decided (against all better judgment) to get a puppy! What were we thinking?! It's a well known fact that I am not a dog person. I can't say that almost a year later that I am much closer to being a dog person, but I suppose he can continue living here. We named him Siegfried after a famous German legend.

May -

School finished! Ahh, what a wonderful relief! Montanna was also given the opportunity to be commander of his squadron for a few months while we waited for his incoming commander to arrive. All in all, I would say it was an experience that will aid him in the future. We kept it local for the most part. I took some pictures of the girls in harsh and terrible lighting for Mother's Day, and we visited some of the local festivals that were beginning now that the weather was warming somewhat.

The yellow flowers are canola. Easter/Mother's Day dresses provided by Montanna's mom.

June -

So, I have an incredibly supportive, wonderful husband who works tirelessly, usually over 50 hours a week, yet never hesitates to put the kids to bed, give them a bath, make them dinner, etc. We usually don't do big gifts or anything for Father's Day, so I thought it would be the perfect time to surprise him. There just so happened to be a Belgian beer festival taking place in Antwerp, so I set up child care (thanks, SL & J), did a ton of research on the beer, made sure that he could leave the country, and reserved us a spot on a bus headed that way. It was a fantastic success, though it perhaps left us with a few blisters and a bit of a dehydrated headache. We heard a lot of hype about German beer before we moved here, and I can't say that I appreciate anything aside from the size of German beers. Once you've had a few, you've pretty much had them all. Belgian beer...well, it hardly ever disappoints.  We have been able to visit Gent, Brugge, and Antwerp, and I have loved all three cities. Montanna liked his Father's day trip.

 This statue commemorates the slaying of the terrible giant Druon Antigone who illegally levied a 50% tax on ships that wished to pass. The figure depicted, the hero Salvus Brabo, heard of this terrible giant and sought to put an end to his tyranny. After several days of fighting, he managed to slay the giant, slice off his hand, and throw it into the river. You can purchase chocolate hands at nearly every chocolate store in Antwerp.

Montanna is pre-gaming a beer festival with beer, and I decided to have a coffee.

This is the daily menu from a local beer bar/restaurant. Billie is the charming French bulldog who will greet you when you pass by on the street and invite you in; however, he will ignore you once you become a paying customer. The food at this establishment is probably the best I have had in Europe.

July --

The weather in Germany is fairly cool. November through February are generally cold with a little snow. The rest of the months, excepting a few weeks in July and August are also cool, with daily highs averaging in the 60s and 70s, and the warmer days reaching the low 80s. Nights in these "warmer" months are usually in the low 50s and 60s. NOT LAST SUMMER. Let me tell you. A few days without AC is fine, especially when you can open your windows at night and let in the cool 60 degree air. Last July and August we had weeks of temperatures in the upper 80s and 90s, and the lows stayed in the high 70s! It was horrible. I would find an excuse to drive somewhere in my car nearly every day just so I could blast the AC. We went to see movies on base. We bought a crappy pool for over 50 euros. We visited the fountains in villages. Anyway, it was hot, but that didn't stop us from enjoying our village's local chicken festival. It involves a ton of rotisserie chicken, liters of beer, and a band playing your favorite songs from the 80s and 90s. Super fun.

We got into a bit of a drinking contest with Germans, and let me say that I did not have this smile on my face the next morning.

Americans representing.

Such a good daddy.

 August --

School began again, and Sophie headed back to Texas. We continued along the festival circuit. We traveled to northern Germany to a town called Xanten to visit good friends. The kids had a blast, and the parents managed to have fun as well. We also traveled south of Strasbourg to do a little more exploring, and we discovered Cigoland, a super cute little amusement park, Monkey Mountain, and a pretty cool castle.

Xanten, downtown

I loved this picture of Vivi trying to eat her ice cream like Daddy.

We managed to get a picture of the whole family together, and in front of a windmill too!

A view of the town, Kintzheim, which is along the Route de Vins (Wine Road) in France.

The littles enjoying an amusement activity.

A view of Monkey Mountain.

September --

As it turns out, festival season never ends in Germany. Montanna's parents were able to come out and spend time with some of their grand children and see a few sights. It was a blast, but a bit exhausting! We managed to visit the Pumpkin festival in Ludwigsburg, which is the largest pumpkin festival in the world, and probably the prettiest, in my opinion. We also took the grandparents to Strasbourg, and we visited the castle Haut Koenigsbourg as well. Then, we visited the lovely town of Brugge, Belgium with our friend Matt.

Pumpkin festival in Ludwigsburg. One of the lovely sculptures.

Grandma & Grandpa with some grand kiddos & their #5 son

Grandma and Grandpa with the kids in Strasbourg, France

Father & Son & grands/daughters in front of the famous Notre Dame Cathedral in Strasbourg

An art instillation in Brugge.

The horse-drawn carriage ride that has made Brugge the girls' favorite city in Europe.

The square in Brugge.

I took this beautiful picture with my phone! The water was so still this morning.

October --

We learned that we are expecting another baby! However, we kept   the news from our friends and family for a bit. We kept it local because of colds, first trimester pregnancy discomforts, and because we knew that we would be traveling a lot in November and December.

Montanna and I were Darren and Samantha from Bewitched.

Our little princesses for Halloween.

November --

Well, in November I was still taking Anatomy and Physiology. And let me tell you, enduring cat dissection during the first trimester of pregnancy was difficult. Luckily my lab partners sympathized with me and allowed me to read the directions most of the time instead of doing "hands on" participation. We told the world we were having another baby. We visited our friends in Xanten again for their annual Pie & Vine (it's a wine and pie contest, yum). And we enjoyed Thanksgiving with friends.

All the secret wines, lined up.

One of the beautiful pies.

Festive party-goers.

It's a baby! Sophie was thrilled too.

December --

Whoa, December was a whirlwind. We had the squadron Christmas party, we had a million colds. We traveled up to Xanten to see Star Wars and attend a birthday party. We visited a few Christmas markets. We had doctor's appointments. We went to Strasbourg again. We opened presents. It was a great time, but we definitely looked forward to the quiet of early January.

In the Netherlands, grabbing a quick pizza before watching Star Wars episode 7.

We're at a movie! Without children!

We took the kids to a children's Christmas circus in Xanten. They loved it and may want to be clowns and acrobats when they grow up.

Rudolph the red-nosed Herc.

The girls got presents from the Squadron Santa.

The German equivalent of boy scouts traveled to Israel (Bethlehem?) to light a candle, and they brought that light back to Germany. Here it is (in Xanten). Pretty cool.

Vivi had unmatched enthusiasm on Christmas morning.

And that's about it! A pretty great year!